


Life

by Littlemuffinheads



Series: Venting thru mcyt’s [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Gender Issues, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mentioned Homophobic comments?, Self-Harm, Sexuality Crisis, Toxic friendship?, Trans Male Character, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:35:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28922955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Littlemuffinheads/pseuds/Littlemuffinheads
Summary: Me venting on a mcyt TvTTw’s in tags, i might of forgotten some so be carefulThis is trash but whateverReal names aren’t used.
Series: Venting thru mcyt’s [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2152086
Kudos: 7





	Life

**Author's Note:**

> I listened to jubilee line while writing this
> 
> This is gonna suck because i just copied this from my notebook without fixing anything but read if you want

Bad has always been happy. At least thats what people thought. Bad was always a beaming ball of happiness and enjoyment. She, of course, had some times where she was anything but that, but rarely. She was seen as happy by everyone, and she hoped to keep it that way.

Inside, Bad was nothing. To start off with, she has had problems with her sexuality and gender that she couldn’t tell anyone. She was afraid of people being homophobic so she kept this stuff to herself. She decided that she was pansexual since she has had crushes on people of all gender.

For her gender.... she never really felt like a girl. She (?) always wore ‘boy’ clothes and liked masculine things. Bad also despised anything that would be considered ‘girly’. She researched about this stuff and realized that sh-he was transgender. He could tell only people online, people in real life would most likely be transphobic.   
  
At the same time, he was having a hard time making friends. Though, he did keep to himself most of the time, that being one of the reasons why. He was also very quiet and a teachers pet. In the end, Bad ended up making three friends, Skeppy, A6d, and Cara.

He eventually realized he had a crush on two of them, Skeppy and A6d. Bad never, ever, risked telling them. He didn’t want to lose his closest ‘friends’. Having a crush on both of them and wanting to just be with both brought up the idea of being polyamorous, but he didn’t pay much attention to that. He had other things to worry about.

A6d and him got into a couple fights, but after a day or so, they were make up. But the thing was, Bad was the one to apologize, and never A6d. He would rarely and when he did, he sounded like he was just trying to get out of the situation. Nevertheless, Bad still liked him, despite the obvious red flags.   
  


When him and his friends graduated, they began to be distant. Him and Cara couldn’t talk anymore, since they didn’t have anything to actually talk to each other on. Skeppy, he still talked to him but not that much. For A6d.... him and Bad got into a fight that neither of them could take back. This made him really sad and pushed him further into doing something that he could regret.

Even though its been a while since the incident has happened with him and A6d, he still tried to talk to him. Eventually A6d stopped responding, though, Bad still had a fading crush on him.

Back with Skeppy, Bad had confessed his feelings to skeppy. Skeppy said that he used to like him, but stopped, this is what made Bad break. Bad just played it off as ‘he used to like him too’. Fortunately, Skeppy believed him and they kept being friends. He was relieved that he believed him, he didn’t want to lose another friend. Bad just decided to forget that this situation ever happened.

After that, this was one of the first times that his life was okay. But of course, not everything continues as happy. Bad ended up telling Skeppy that he was a transmale, skeppy being okay with it.   
  


Once in class, a teacher called him a girl because of his voice, this made Bad really dysphoric. After school, Skeppy said that it was funny that the teacher called him a girl, clearly knowing that he was a transboy. Bad told him that it made extremely gender dysphoric and that it hurt. Skeppy just responded with “okay?” This pushed Bad over his limit and did something that nobody could of thought he would do.

Bad began self-harming. He had always wanted to, he just didn’t know what would happen. All he did was slide scissor blades across his skin, it gave small cuts. He wasn’t ‘satisfied’ so be began to cut on his feet too. After, he looked at himself and a small grin appeared on his face. It was genuine, the first one in a while.   
  
He didn’t bother covering his cuts, concluding that he thought nobody would notice. Most likely because he lives with a very small part of his family. Also because he doesn’t really hang out with his friends. Well, he was right. Nobody ever noticed the cuts. He ended up telling Skeppy but he didn’t care, Bad thought that he didn’t believe him.

Soon after, they stopped being friends. Mostly because Bad thought Skeppy deserved better. He also did it because of the constant homophobic comments he made. Bad deleted every conversation and everything that he could communicate to him with. He did this for him, Bad didn’t treat him well enough. He deserved better.

Skeppy tried to communicate to him still, but Bad couldn’t bring to answer. He eventually stopped trying. Bad wanted to answer, but he still thought he didn’t deserved Skeppy- or even friends at all. He wanted to have friends, he wanted to have fun, but he didn’t want the same thing to happen again.

A little after that, his siblings came out to him, to which he also came out. His sister, though, talked to him about all her problems about stuff like that, not even giving Bad a chance to tell her what he was going through.

Bad felt overwhelmed with all the information being dropped on him. He was scared of accidentally telling someone all that personal information. On top of that, he also had his own problems, so he had to balance his sister’s problems as well as his. He never told anyone any of his, since everyone though he was happy. Only one person knew a little bit, Skeppy. He had told him before they stopped being friends, since he couldn’t tell anyone that would do anything about them. But knowing him, he probably forgot already.

Bad started self-harming more to relief himself. At first he started on his arms, then he slowly moved down to his legs. He roughly slide the blade up and down his arms and legs, going as deep as he could bring himself to. Every cut, there was a little blood, which the sight of it made Bad ecstatic and made bad cut even more.

He just let the blood sit there, drying. He didn’t care about cleaning it. Nobody would notice, since he only lived with one of his siblings and one of his parents, which he barely saw. Plus, he wore hoodies and jeans all the time, so nobody would see anyways. 

Years later, he’s older now. He was home alone, silently writing something on a piece of paper. Bad was concentrating so much on a simple piece of paper. On the paper it read,

“Dear whoever sees this,

I don’t know why. I don’t know why i’m like this. I can’t handle this anymore, the constant reminder that I failed, that i’m useless. So, please, just remember me. Even if it’s just a little bit, just please.

-Bad”

That’s just life. 

**Author's Note:**

> All in all, just a mcyt vent fic  
> Hope you enjoyed reading- if you did read this.


End file.
